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5 Reasons I Don’t Get Halloween

Tell me I’m wrong…

Ever since I was a kid I haven’t seen the fuss about Halloween. But I know some people — OK a lot of people — love it deeply, so I feel I have to explain my position.

Here are 5 reasons why pumpkins and scary masks fill me with dread each year (and not because I’m scared, just because I’m disappointed…and slightly annoyed.)

1. I Don’t Like Scary Stuff

You know those teenage parties when, at the end of the night everyone would watch a horror movie together? Always my cue to go. Here’s Johnny… there goes Andy. Freddie’s back, and Andy’s gone home.

Being scared is not a nice feeling. So why go chasing it?

2. Trick Or Treat Is Rubbish

I used to work in radio and part of the job was coming up with feature ideas. Games, talking points, interactive moments that got the audience involved and worked for everyone that was listening.

If one of my team had come up with idea of “Trick Or Treat”, I’d have thought it was a good name, but I’d have wanted the format to work better than it currently does.

Here’s how it works in the UK. Knock on the door. “Trick or treat?” comes the chorus from a gaggle of garishly dressed kids.