Respect to you for sharing your story, Carly. I can identify with a lot of it. I'm learning that my weight is all about my relationship with food and it sounds like you've been on a similar journey. Like any relationship it changes with age, context, knowledge, reflection, mindset, mental health. We're all different and if food and weight are problematic for us then we need to find 'our' way to move forward, and it's unlikely to all be pacakged up in a fat-free meal range or a diet book. You've found your way and I congratulate you for it.